My Conversation with Resistance
Resistance:: I’m getting a strong sense that you know how powerful I am today.
Me: Yeah, I’m kind of hating you today because I’m really feeling resistant today. It’s like I am totally consumed by you.
Resistance: Good! That’s the way I like it because then I get to be in control.
Me: What’s so cool about being in control? Don’t you see how it’s causing me all this suffering? I’m not into suffering, btw. I want peace and contentment.
Resistance: Well, then I guess it sucks to be you . You see when you hang out with me, as you have been today, you don’t have to do anything different. You can stay stuck in your familiar victim story where you can blame everything and everybody else! It’s not so bad here if you get used to it. Besides, you will feel more normal being in resistance because it seems very few are not, so why not just fit in with the masses?
Me: Because you are toxic! You make me feel anxious, worried, alone and afraid. That doesn’t make me feel like I have any control over anything! I’m sick of this and I’m sick of you! I know that the only way to stop allowing you to make me miserable is by accepting my reality EXACTLY as it is.
Resistance: Yeah, but if you accept your reality, then be forewarned. It aint going to feel good!
Me: As if resistance does?
Resistance: I thought you wanted to feel in control?
Me: Just discussing this with you has me realizing that I’d rather feel peaceful versus trying to control everything. It’s not working anyway. I’m thinking that the reason I fight acceptance is because it means I can no longer avoid, distract or flee from my experience. And sometimes my experience, my reality, is painful, so I resist feeling it and it just continues. You really are powerful, Resistance!
Resistance: Duh! Why do you think I am who I am? I learned that a long time ago and I will never choose to accept. Pain sucks and I’d much rather resist the pain than to feel that dark energy. I’ll just stay right here, thank you very much.
Me: Fine. We all have choices to make. I don’t agree with your choice and you don’t have to agree with mine. My new choice is that I’m going to get the support I need to no longer hang out with you. I also want you to know that all the time I’ve spent with you has been a great lesson. I know it might be difficult to let you go but I really need and want to. My dharma is to experience joy and pleasure and to teach others to do the same by living fearlessly and I can’t do it by allowing you to influence me. Thank you for being who you are. I know I will still run into you so just know that I will kindly acknowledge you and move forward.
Resistance: I’m feeling pretty resistant about you abandoning me. I’m not liking this and I feel out of control.
Me: There’s no reason you can’t join me into acceptance. I’ll hold your hand through it. What if we do this together?
Resistance: I suppose I’d have to then believe that I’m not bad or wrong. I just am and I can choose to shift, just like you, right?
Me: I can only do what I can do and hope you come along someday. Either way, I have great gratitude for you and for all that you taught me and will continue to teach me. My wish is that, through acceptance, I can be your teacher as well. Know that I accept you exactly as you are. Acceptance is feeling really good. It opens my heart and an open heart will heal the world. Namaste
Join me in acceptance today. And if you don’t know how, call me at 630 244 0920.